I Just Need to Rant

So much for my happy moods. Have you ever felt like life just kicks you when you're down? Well, that's basically been my day today. I was excited to start the day. Ready for my statistics and development classes. I was going to make it a good day, but everything just seemed to be going wrong. I couldn't concentrate on homework because my house was too noisy. I tried to relax a little by playing piano, and I guess that was good. I just have way too many thoughts on my mind, and I don't have any way to release them because if I did, people would probably question my sanity.

Oh, I also didn't get the car I've been trying to get for the past week. I went over, and a guy came in with cash and got it instead. So, that's disappointing.

One of my friends came to me with a difficult problem, and I tried to help comfort her, so we went to the temple. That was nice, peaceful, and helped me clear my head a little bit. It was funny; we somehow got on the topic of couples and marriage and whatnot (I guess it's because we were at the temple or something), and were sitting out front when this guy leads his blindfolded girlfriend over to the front and proposes to her! I felt way awkward, so we left and chose another place to sit. It was interesting.

Before I left for the temple, I had this crazy insane headache. It's back again. I couldn't read my textbooks, and was going to take a nap. That didn't work. I read instead, and got an even worse headache. This is what hours of class all day can do to you. So, I have a bunch to read tomorrow. Thank goodness labor day weekend is soon. I really need to catch up with everything (already...).

Why does life have to be so stressful and complicated?

I just realized this today, but I'm making decisions right now that are going to affect the rest of my life. It really took a toll on me and I just thought about it for a minute. What do I really want out of life? I can't postpone these decisions much longer, so when should I make them? Now? Tomorrow? I don't have all the details, so how can I make the best decision for me? Gah! Can to you tell I'm completely overwhelemed.

Hopefully tomorrow brings a better day. In my mood right now though, I highly doubt that tomorrow will be any good. Maybe I'm lacking sleep. I know I'm lacking socialization that I've been depending on for a long time. I really need to find something that makes me happy. I'm usually pretty good at this (or at least at faking it), but recently, not so much. I'm tired, don't feel good, and can't seem to open up. What next?

Goodness, I need some sleep. Very badly. Maybe it'll cure some of the stress in my mind. Blogger, thank you for letting me rant. It was a good chat.

Two posts in a row... that's pretty incredible for me. But, I need to talk, well, figuratively. Moreso, I just need to put thoughts down.

So, here's my dilemma. I love psychology, but I'm seriously thinking about changing my major to english. I have no idea why I'm thinking this, but I am. Maybe my mind thinks there are more jobs for english majors than for psychology majors (which is probably likely). But, I'm not going to make a decision just yet. I have all the prerequisites to switch majors, but I'm not sure if that's what I really want.

More problems. I've been car shopping recently, and I found a car that I really like. It's a gold saturn, 2 door... I don't really know the rest of the details, but I like how it drives, and my brother says it's in good condition, so I'll take his word for it. Here's where my problem comes in. Another person also wants the car and went in before I did to the dealership. I'm really hoping their financing doesn't come through. That's terrible to say, but I've been looking for weeks, and I actually, really like this car and really want it. Not to mention it looks great. It's sporty-ish looking and matches me quite well.

School. Let's see... I don't think I will ever be able to post without somehow including school. But, let's post on a positive note! School's very interesting (good interesting). I've already learned a ton, and we're barely starting the second week! Today in my behavioral neuroscience class we looked at a real human brain! It was exciting. It's amazing what our brains do...

Institute is amazing. I absolutely love it. I have it first class on mondays and wednesdays. Hopefully having it at the first of the week will get me off to the right start every week. I can't wait to start hearing about doctrinal insights, stories, and truly trying to improve myself through learning.

So, I think I'm starting to go back to myself again, which is good. I greatly dislike being a pain to deal with, so that me is (hopefully) gone for the time being. For now at least, I'll keep things light and happy on here.

Useful Boring Knowledge

Car shopping is a pain. I really need to find one that I want soon. I'm hoping that this one guy doesn't buy a little saturn I want, but he put a down payment on it, so he most likely will. If not though, then it's mine! Muahahahaha!

I'm in a much better mood today. It has been quite tiresome for the most part, but I haven't had to go to class, and I barely had to study. Tomorrow though, that's a different story. New ward, here I come! I'm very excited to be going to the singles' ward, but I'm terrified too. I know all the girls and people in my ward so well; it will be quite a transition to switch. But, I'm looking forward to it, nonetheless.

School is getting better. I think I'm finally starting to figure out which classes I actually need to study for. Behavioral neuroscience is going to be a living hell, not exagerrating. It is probably the worst class to take for a person who does not memorize terms very well. Statistical methods isn't going to be as bad as I thought it would. I don't know why I'd struggle with the math course. I guess it's because everyone I talked to said it was so difficult. I hope to prove them wrong.

Social psych is my Favorite! I really am so excited for this class I have already read a few chapters and we only needed to read the first one so far. Haha, maybe I shouldn't focus on it too much, but I will most definitely be doing something in this field. I am almost positive about that.

My other two classes are only one night a week, so I'm not too worried about them. Adult development and aging will be pretty depressing, but stress management will be oh so helpful. We're actually going to learn different methods for relaxation and how to do them right! I'm so excited! I'll need to learn it for this semester, especially for memorizing all the parts of the brain and nervous system... wow. I'm overwhelmed with everything. This is why I didn't pursue a biology major.

Life is good though. I'm loving my institute class. THe foam dance last night was epically amazing! I loved it!!! I didn't realize that it was the wet soapy foam, so I wasn't quite dressed how I wish I would have to get all wet. Jeans and tennis shoes don't really do that great in water. But it was still pretty awesome!

I'm starting to make new friends in my classes. Hopefully I can make some good friends that will last through the next few years of college. I need a good study group too because I'm finding some of the topics very difficult to comprehend on my own.

I know that everyone just loves hearing about my school life. It's so interesting, no? Lol, honestly, I am quite a boring person. I don't even know why I keep this blog, but I am actually starting to write a lot more, so I guess that's good.

I'm hoping college gives me more of a social experience than high school did. Since I basically had no social life in high school, I don't think this is too much to ask for. If I hang out once a month I'll have more of a social life than I did in high school. Either way, I'm here to learn, and I don't think I will ever take this many hard classes all together again. My advice? Take 2 or 3 hard courses and 2 or 3 easy courses. Stay balanced, it's much easier.